Saturday, March 3, 2007

Events For 4/24/03 to 4/30/03

We have heard rumors that Party Volcano would be practicing creative accounting by keeping a "real" party list and "fake" list and all those new 900 subscribers, who just signed up, are being sent to the lame parties while we meanwhile are snorting coke off Brad Pitt's ass!

Unfortunately that's not true. It is true, though, that we cannot write about private parties unless we get permission to do so (see Rachael's house warming party). This week we cannot forward invitations to private parties like Mary and Solveig's birthday party, Don's April Soiree, Cara's 30th birthday, the Sustainable Style Foundation launch party, and the wild "Something for Nothing Party"...


Friday 4/25.
11:00 AM WALL OF SOUND's moving sale (1st day).
8:00 PM Cedric and Nathan's farewell party at Barca
8:30 PM Funny Salsa Competition @ China Harbor's Grand Ballroom.
9:00 PM ART-BOMB! @ C.H.A.C.
10:00 PM BAISAKHI BOLLYWOOD @ Chop Suey

Saturday 4/26.
9:00 AM Volunteers' Meeting for SIFF.
11:00 AM WALL OF SOUND's moving sale (2nd day).
8:00 PM Paula's Moving to NYC Party @ Barca.
9:00 PM Liver Transplant Benefit Art Show @ Cafe Venus & the Mars Bar.
9:00 PM? Rachael's House Warming Party in Fremont.
9:30 PM Los Peligrosos @ Patti Summers Cabaret.

Sunday 4/27.
6:00 PM Crafty Church Social at The ReBar.
7:00 PM CROSS DRESS BOWLING in "Ballard".
8:00 PM Interbay @ EMP Lounge.
9:00 PM Beat-Bop @ The Baltic Room

Wednesday 4/30.

4:00 PM? Wine Study in Kirkland.
7:00 PM Granta’s Best of Young British Novelists, 2003 @ UW

Friday 4/25.

WALL OF SOUND's moving sale!

Carmelle (currently living in NYC) is pointing out this great sale:

Moving Sale in Belltown - Friday and Saturday April 25 & 26... 11 am to 7 pm.

2237 2nd Ave @ Bell St. in the Back Room at Wall of Sound - store sales also... help lighten our load.... After 13 years of paying rent we were given a 50% increase on 30 days notice... all very sudden. please stop by if you can....
Mark ....
p.s. also available - gas stove and refrigerator.

Flyer: http://photos.yahoo.com/bc/partyvolcano/vwp?.dir=/Invitations&.dnm=sale.jpg


Cedric and Nathan's farewell party at Barca

Cedric is moving to New York City and Nathan is moving to Spain. This is their farewell party and this might be your last chance to hear Cedric's famous circumcision story from the legend himself:

Hi All,

Finally, the day is coming close and so it's time to party! Nathan is leaving as well (to Spain), so we will share the evening. We'll be at Barca's at 8pm on Friday the 25th of April.

Come and join us for a drink!

Cheers,

Cedric

Barca, 1510 11th (between Pike and Pine), 8 pm, free.

Funny Salsa Competition @ China Harbor's Grand Ballroom.

Claudio is offering a special Party Volcano deal:

Hi, Here is the deal the first 10 People Get in for free (If they mention PartyVolcano). Everybody else get 1/2 off if they Mention the PartyVolcano. Cover is $15 Free Beginners lesson From 8:30-9 Free Intermediate lesson From 9-9:45PM Live Music Start @10:30PM Dj Music And A Funny (Comedy Style) Salsa Competition.


Seattle's Top Dancers (and Bravest) Get Together to Compete for the title Of Funniest Salsa Performer In town. Don't miss this opportunity to see Salseros making fun of other salseros or maybe themselves. Also Cambalache, Seattle's Top Salsa Band will make U Dance and enjoy their incredible, high energy performance. So. Come and dance all night long and help us pick Seattle's Funniest Salsa Performer....
The Winner will get a $500 + A Contract with a National Talent Co. for an Upcoming event this summer in Seattle.

Friday's Favorite place for Salseros!
Incredible View of Lake Union
Seattle's Most Elegant Latin Lounge
Lost of Free Parking
Super Friendly Security.
Music For the dancers
and more.........

Thanks Claudio! Our Party Volcano readers will appreciate your offer.

The New China Harbor's Grand Ballroom #2040 Westlake Ave. North.
On the Second Level of China Harbor's Restaurant.

ART-BOMB! @ C.H.A.C.


New Style Collective presents "ART-BOMB!" a benefit to support new art & new artists:

An Art-Party & Masquerade set to explode on
Friday April 25th, 2003, 9:00pm
@ the Capitol Hill Arts Center 21+

New Style Collective is proud to bring you the visual art of:

Chuck Dong, paintings & design.
The Utility Pole Project by Diana Falchuk. www.dianafalchuk.com

The Rodent Series, paintings by Kelly Lyles. www.kellyspot.com

Photography by Louann Rizor & Michael Robertson. www.mikerphoto.com

Paintings by Jae Jin Sim and featuring live painting by Q.Quigg including audio-sensory performances by:

Plastiq Phantom People this incarnation featuring members of FCS North, The Vells & Modest Mouse, Sindri, & DJ Suspense

with additional mind-bombs by: Pleaseeasaur, Fey Ray * Nervewheel and the Sun|Tzu Sound Art|Beat Lounge with DJ's AC Lewis, J-Justice & Atlee


with dance by Troupe Hipnotica (including a new collaboration with Guy Whitmore)

visual projections by Evergreen Eye with a video interlude from FREE TV.

And all this for just: $10 adv!!!


The New Style Collective (NSC) is a non-profit event producer devoted to promoting new & unique collaborations; to support the Arts through the novel idea of giving artists paying gigs. The NSC both aids other non-profit arts groups in the production of their fundraisers as well as presenting its own programming for the benefit the participating arts. Past NSC events have included 2001's FuseBall, 2002's Heaven & Hell Ball, and the annual Halloween event Troll-a-go-go! For more info see www.newstylecollecive.org or e-mail info@newstylecollective.org

ART-BOMB! The first wave of bombs set to drop at 9:00 pm @
the Capitol Hill Arts Center
1621 12th Ave (12th & Pine - the old Morningside School) Advance tickets are available at all RUDY'S Barbershops or online at TicketsWest.com Tickets $15 day-of (or $12 in costume!) ART-BOMB! is a 21 & over event with full bar. For more info see:
www.newstylecollective.org To volunteer at Art-Bomb! contact: volunteer@newstylecollective.org

BAISAKHI BOLLYWOOD @ Chop Suey

It's Bollywood time again:

The monthly Bollywood party is back and BAD as ever. Celebrate Baisakhi the spring festival with your favorite crowd and the wickedest of Bhangra and Hindi Bollywood remixes at Chop Suey (capacity for 650 party people)

>DJ Peter Madrill
>DJ Manpreet Singh
>William Gilchrist on tablas
>Singh on Dhol
>A possible special guest DJ too

SPECIALS:
>Ladies FREE till 11pm
>Ladies who say "YES" to the Evite are FREE all night.
>Guys who say "YES" get FREE until 10:30 pm and then $2 OFF the cover all night.
>Anyone wearing ethnic Indian clothes will be FREE all night

Chop Suey.
Invite yourself and take advantage of their specials:
http://www.evite.com/inviteMore?eventID=XIHJOBPTKVUYWATRGTIV&iid=KOSGWTB
IAZKZJHUZQGKL


Saturday 4/26.

Volunteers' Meeting for SIFF

Gopi tells us that he volunteers for the Seattle International Film Festival, each year. For each hour of volunteering, you get to watch an hour of movies for free.

The Seattle International Film it's annual volunteer orientation meeting! All our department heads will be at this meeting to discuss their volunteer needs. Opportunities include ushering, catering and staging gala events, helping with box office, publicity, promotions, transportation, doing data entry and administrative work, selling merchandise & memberships, and more. Please come prepared to ask questions be scheduled and have fun! We strongly recommend that all new and returning volunteers attend this meeting.

Volunteer meeting held at Egyptian Theatre, 801 Pine Street, 9:00 AM. For more info contact Volunteer Coordinator Evelyn Emanuel at 206-320-1001 or email volunteer@seattlefilm.com. www.seattlefilm.com

Paula's Moving to NYC Party @ Barca.

Paula Fletcher is semi-famous in Seattle party circles for hosting fun fashion shows featuring her line of clothing called Dumb Clothing. Like Cedric (see Friday's listings), Paula is moving to NYC. She'll keep her clothing line going in Seattle but will also open a store in New York.

DRESS TO IMPRESS!!! COME AND SAY GOODBYE TO ME (PAULA) AS I LEAVE SEATTLE TO TAKE OVER NEW YORK.....IN ORDER TO DO THIS I NEED ASSISTANCE DRINKING LOTS OF VODKA AND DRESSING FABULOUSLY........PLEASE WEAR YOUR MOST FANTASTICAL OUTFITS... .WIGS..BOAS...CORSETS... VINYL...FURRY ANYTHING... SHINY EVERYTHING.....ALL OUT!!....WE HAVE THE ENTIRE MEZZ LEVEL RESERVED AND I AM ASKING ALL TO ARRIVE EARLY SO WE CAN COMPLETELY TAKE OVER THE BAR... AND PARTY ON.... FROM 8PM AT BARCA...NO COVER.... PLEASE FORWARD TO ALL WHO MAY ENJOY THIS CHANCE TO SAY GOODBYE TO ME OR JUST WANT TO DRINK MUCH AND DRESS UP.....

Barca, 1510 11th (between Pike and Pine), 8 pm, free. http://www.dumbclothing.com/

Liver Transplant Benefit Art Show @ Cafe Venus & the Mars Bar

Juliana writes:

hello everyone, this saturday, there is a special benefit art show / performance / music night for our dear friend, juliana bradley's mom - who needs a liver transplant. Please come!" - dkpan

this is a reminder about the upcoming art + skill auction - a benefit to raise money for my momma's liver transplant...it goes like this: at Cafe Venus & the Mars Bar (609 Eastlake Ave E) APRIL 26th... 9.00 - Sugarfoot

10.00 - butoh 'skit show' by P.A.N. with special guest Haruko Nishimura, music by Joshua Kohl and Robb Kunz

11.00 - Live Skill Auction

11.30 - Ensemble Sub Masa

12.30 - Silent Art Auction Winners Announced!(The silent art auction will be ongoing throughout the evening)

i'm asking for a $5.00 donation ~ or pay what you can...
Art has been generously donated by: megan purn, megan lingafelter, andrew barker, erin brown, david brown, natalia ramien, dm sameshima, jesse elliott, iggi green, sara lanzillotta, troy lancaster, michael knutson, debra cha pman, chris springer, ve rn blast, david rossman, patrick taylor, ben nechanicky, and a couple from myself, juliana bradley. Skills have been generously donated by: megan lingafelter (custom made panty set), david rossman (skateboarding lesson: comes with skateboard!) keely fetters (acupuncture), britt ashley (dirty french maid), laura prindle (dinner for four), sherra cunningham (tarot card reading) - and that juliana bradley again (dinner for four, house painting). More skills to be announced. And hey! please pass this on to anyone you think may be interested in coming - and if you'd like a list of the art available and starting bids, let me know and i'll send it your way. and again, thank you - you fill my heart with gladness, juliana

You should go and support this event. One day you might need a liver too.
Cafe Venus & the Mars Bar (609 Eastlake Ave E), 9pm, $5.


Rachael's House Warming Party in Fremont.

Remember? Last week Rachael invited you to a house warming party in Fremont on Saturday 4/26. You only had to answer the question: "The Black Rock Gazette is the daily publication for what event?". Did you get on the list? If so please read on. Rachael writes:

Hi, Lovelies:

So I'm glad that my celebratory fearlessness has provided senseless fodder for the masses, indeed, and now I'm here to offer The Fine Print with regards to the housewarming on Saturday. If you've RSVP'd, you must read this e-mail.

The housewarming promises to be big and fluffy, and I'm admittedly approaching levels of honest concern and overflowing happiness. Here's how you can help buffer the former:

(1) RESPECT THE NEIGHBORS. When you arrive and when you leave, please be quiet as a mouse. Please don't loiter around the front of the townhouse -- there are plenty of outdoor smoking areas that can be reached from within the townhouse. If you plan to be drunk, then pleaase commit this to memory now: I am a mouse. I am a very quiet, inconsequential mouse. I am not always a mouse, but when I arrive at Rachael's pad and leave
Rachael's pad, I am a mouse. Thank you.

(2) KEEP THE NOISE TO A MINIMUM. When you're at the party, notice all the lovely bay windows and realize that the neighbors can probably hear most of what you're saying. I don't care what you say, per se, I just care how loud you say it. Even if we can't let the DJs have crazylong sets throughout the night, we still want this party to last until morning. That potential depends a lot on you lovelies. So see Point 1, and I'll trust we're on the same page. Thank you.

(3) THIS IS NOT AN ORGY. It's a Bed&Breakfast of sorts. So you're welcome to stay the night. Just bring blankets and pillows to make your stay more comfy. 'Nuff said.

(4) I AM NOT LOADED. Despite the potential implications of Point 3. But parties tend to dwindle when the alcohol goes to nil. So consider bringing supplementary goods, just in case I can't accommodate you all.

And, with that, I welcome you all to Rachael's Bed&Breakfast. I look forward to pampering you. I hope you enjoy your stay.

Best regards,

Rachael

Please respect those basic party rules. Otherwise we would have to send Mr. Deran(ged) Ludd to your home, who will hypnotize you with delusional ranting before he will remove your liver.

Thanks again, Rachael, for inviting Party Volcano!


Los Peligrosos @ Patti Summers Cabaret

Los Peligrosos writes:

Hey kind folks at Party Volcano,

I'm one of the newbies on the list. I'd been wondering if Seattle had many sort of list like this, my pals in L.A. have had a sort of organized event telephone hotline for years. Glad to see you're doing this.

I was wondering, would you be so kind as to list the following show in next week's event listing? The band I'm in (Los Peligrosos) is playing, and the venue is a great dive-bar in Pike Place Market that not a lot of people know about - the owner doesn't advertise at all. So any additional publicity we could garner for this show would be greatly appreciated. The details are below:

Saturday, April 26th, at Patti Summers Cabaret

(94 Pike St., underneath the Pike Place Bar & Grill).

Three bands, $3.00. Stiff drinks, and some great old-school (The Clash, Sex Pistols, X) punk influenced rock & roll for your listening pleasure. The bands are (in order):

9:30 - The Simians - featuring Mike Soldano of Soldano Custom
Amplification & Flav Giorgini of Guitarpunk.com

10:45 - Los Peligrosos - featuring 4 people old enough to know better

12:00 - Trash Train - featuring Bob & "Maddog" Tami, proprieters of the fabulous Stanwood Hotel, the finest tavern & live music in Stanwood

Music starts at 9:30. Patti & Gary (the owners) have a heavy hand with the booze, so come on out & enjoy yourself with us!

Details can be found at http://www.lospeligrosos.com

Thank you so much!
Miss Hell'N

Los Peligrosos

web site - http://www.lospeligrosos.com
mp3s - http://mp3.com/lospeligrosos


Sunday 4/27.

Crafty Church Social at The ReBar.

The glue gun and sewing machines part touched us:

Sunday, April 27, Crafty Church Social at The ReBar-1114 Howell St 6:00 - 9:00 p.m. Bring supplies to use and share. Glue Guns and Sewing Machines welcome.

www.churchofcraft.org


CROSS DRESS BOWLING in "Ballard".


At the first glance this does sound like a lot of fun:

Men: Dust off your pumps! Women: Work on your swagger! Join Seattle Art Car Blowout for our 4th annual Cross Dress Bowling fun-raiser. SEE! Bad bowling only rivalled by the bad drag! WIN! Prizes as gaudy as only art car afficionados can make them! ROLL! Heavy balls at pins that refuse to budge! SEE! The largest agglutination of art cars in one place short of SACBO itself. This event is open to all -- the more, the madder, in fact!

But PV reporter Steve Miller warns:

Hmmmm, cross dressing, bowling and art cars - is this how straight people have fun nowadays? Hey, don't get me wrong - I know most transvestites are heterosexual, but I thought bad drag was reserved for us homos to mock straight society. Whatever the case, here's your chance to look at kooky art cars with all sorts of gew-gaws glued on them and painted all funny, dress up in your Value Village finest, and bowl to raise money for future kooky art car events. And it's in Ballard - land of supposed normalcy!

Here's my suggestion: if you must go - BE WEIRD. Don't just put on any old cross-dressing crap - have some fucking style, people. And no, I'm not talking about the 70s - I'm saying cut several holes in that dress to show off your chest hair and ass. And for the ladies, I'm hoping every one of you has a monster sock cock bursting out of your underpants. As Burning Man culture is quickly being assimilated by mainstream society it is your job to keep it weird. Otherwise this event will just be another version of a Sadie Hawkins dance.

P.S. Pretending to be fey and gay while dressed as a woman will only infuriate the great god Faggotus, who will surely reign down syphillis on all your children. kisses!

Sunday, April 27, 7 p.m.
Sunset Lanes, Ballard (Market, just east of 15th Ave NW)
$15, includes two games (shoe rental separate)
Contact:
lukemcguff@yahoo.com
Steven Miller Photography and Design, http://www.smiller555.com.


Interbay @ EMP Lounge.

Arthur Schile from Interbay writes:

Well, it's been months in the making. Speculation and anticipation abound. Now you can come see for yourself! Interbay, that band I'm in that I'm always talking about, is finally going to play in front of other people. We are going to play the open mic night at the EMP Liquid Lounge.

WHEN: Sunday, April 27th from 8 til 10.
Be there at 8 pm and expect to stay for as much as a couple of hours. Drinks are cheap and the atmosphere is good. I really hope that all of you can make it cause the more folks in the crowd the better we'll play! Bring lot's of friends!

EMP Lounge, 8pm, free.

Beat-Bop @ The Baltic Room

J-Justice writes:

hey PV, i am writing you a special invite to our party this sunday. why? cuz last time we had a special DJ from London your crew was there shakin' they asses until the very end. that was at the seiji show. well seiji said that the guy we have this sunday is THE BEST DJ in their scene. so i hope to see some of you there gettin' yer freak on. here's the 411:

SunTzu Sound and The Baltic Room present Beat-Bop
with very special guest

DOMU (aka Rima)
(Jazzanova-Compost Records, 2000 Black, Archive)
with SunTzu Sound DJs: AC Lewis - Atlee - J-Justice

Beat freaks and dancefloor junkies listen up!

This is not to be missed as DOMU makes his first tour of the states. Every Artist from Jazzanova to Bugz in the Attic to Kyoto Jazz Massive swear that DOMU is the HOTTEST Broken Beat DJ around. Opening set by SunTzu Sound DJs: AC Lewis - Atlee - J-Justice Visuals by Electricbaby.com

DOMU will be on EXPANSIONS with KIDHOPS at 8pm Sunday night on KEXP Tune in for free tickets.

CONTEST: I have 2 copies of DOMU's new RIMA cd to give away. The first 2 people who come to the show with a print-out of this email will receive a copy of RIMA's "This World" Check it here: http://www.compost-records.com/sections/labels/jcr_arti/rima.php3/

The Baltic Room, 1207 Pine Street, 9pm - close 21+

Preview some of DOMU's DJ sets here: http://www.milkaudio.com/web/sets/guest/domu.ram
http://www.groovetech.com/PhoenixData/SilverStream/Pages/srvltRecMed?RecordedMediaID=92003

for more info visit http://www.suntzusound.com


Wednesday, 4/30

Granta’s Best of Young British Novelists, 2003 @ UW


For original literary work, I think that one of the best magazines out there is “Granta.” It’s a quarterly, and each issue loosely centers around a theme such as: “Children: Blind, Bitter Happiness” or “Celebrity” or “Confessions of a Middle-Aged Ecstasy Eater.” In general it’s fantastic stuff—the very opposite of the typical narcolepsy-inducing literary magazine.

The current issue is Granta’s vote for the “Best of Young British Novelists, 2003.” Three of the chosen authors—Susan Elderkin, Andrew O’Hagen, and Andrew Warner—will be here, in person and in Seattle, to discuss and read from their work. If you are interested in contemporary literature this should be an interesting and entertaining evening.

University of Washington, Kane Hall, Room 110; 7 pm; Free—but you need to get advance free tix at University Bookstore (4326 University Way NE). Free tix are given on a first come, first serve basis.

More info:
http://www.bookstore.washington.edu/ubs/main.taf?area=events&page=events&catagory=events#ticket
Granta: www.granta.com


Wine Study in Kirkland.

Wanna get drunk and get paid for it? Then this might work for you:

Wine enthusiasts needed for a research study on brands of wine. NO SALES INVOLVED!!! we are interested only in your opinions. The Focus Group will take place in our offices in Carillon Point in Kirkland, on April 30th, 2003. The groups are 90 min. and you will receive $50.00 to $75.00 for your participation.

For more info please call:425.822.8900 and reference the "Wine Study"

Source: http://www.craigslist.org/sea/eve/10445583.html


Future Lava.


SAUCEBOWL on Sat, 5/3.

This is different from the Cross Dress Bowling event in "Ballard":

You know the drill by now: Sauce-BOWLing, Sauce-Karaoke-ing, Sauce-merriment with Seattle's sauciest!

Never been?
What are you waiting for?!??!
Everybody's doing it! Invite your friends. Invite your friends' friends.
Invite good looking strangers.
$10 per person; advance payment by mail required.
This gets you lots o' bowling and a night full o' fun!

Prizes: Handsome bowling attire is handsomely rewarded.

If you would like to join the 7th Annual Saucebowl on May 3rd you will have to send your $10 check to the following address (mailing deadline is on Tuesday, April 29th):

Checks made payable to:
Leilani Lanes

Mail today to:
Dana Myers
2331 North 65th Street
Seattle WA 98103

Hre are more details:

Sauceballers, non-Sauceballers & Sauceball wannabes
JOIN THE FUN!
$10 pp advance payment required
Mail your check today!

Bowl to your heart’s content on our very own private lanes with automatic scoring! Fee includes shoes and snacks.
No host bar and full service restaurant.

Bowling attire strongly encouraged ----and rewarded!
The tackier, the better.

Saturday May 3rd 2003
7:00 – 9:45 p.m. bowling
10:00 p.m. – 1:45 a.m. karaoke

Leilani Lanes
10201 Greenwood Avenue North Seattle
206/783.8010 if you need directions


Letters to the editor.

Party Volcano is still in negotiations with Mr. Ludd. In one of his latest emails he is asking for $86000 a week and a chilled case of Heineken a week.


From Deran Ludd:

Mmmm, Northwest pussy...Hey, I suggested the low tide and crabs eating your faces off! Down to the bonje. How many ways can I say it! You are degraded fossilized little shits forced out of some midwestern anus and crawled over to my former city. former city. that is the clue dumbfucks, former. think on it and research.

Did you contact Dr. Dan "Kissinger" about fraud and delusionary ranting? I doubt it. You bosche loving petty bourgeois yuppies are too ignorant / frightened of facing yourselves in a smudgy cracked mirror to contemplate what that relentless moron Savage is really talking about. Or any of the other Thalidomide babies that write for that cat box liner.

Okay, how about this; go fuck yourselves with barbed wire? Or, go to a Belllevue Indoor Gun Range and rent some hand guns and shoot each other. Or, I still hate you but I am old and tired and my time is short and I have lost interest in whether you all live or die? Sorry to disappoint! But you are really rather boring. If you were making some effect on the public scene, or issued some sort of statement regarding the wants and wishes of the pathetic shit eating out of towners that run the show here. Give me something to get riled about (again, I refer you to Dr. Dan "Kissinger" Savage)!

Party Volcano indeed. How pathetic! Sad even! I feel sorrier than I do angry toward you little kids! What a horrible time to be in grade school! You are 8 or 9? Right? I mean., that would explain your sad self centered world view. Otherwise, if you are not elementary kids...I would suggest Harborview's psychward. Surprisingly good food and lots of chess boards and a truly amazing array of DVDs to watch. And I can recommend some of the nurses!

As I said, I am bored with your nothingness. You will have to do better to get death threats and cannibalism out of me! Not to mention I have not seen any of the $86K a week, let alone a chilled case of Heineken! fucking liars and scoundrels!

Sincerest Regards Available, Sweet Kindly Best Intentioned and Well Mannered, Uncle Deran


Mr. Ludd,

Thank you for your interest in a position at Party Volcano. We offer our employees a generous benefits package, an on-site gym, and lots of opportunities for stimulating career growth.

The job position you are applying for, Senior Crazy Fuck, calls for skills your application letters have demonstrated well: self-contradictory rambling and reference to ownership of a cattle prod. In your application, you refer to Party Volcano staff members as "fucking little rat-assed clowns" and "tumorous invertebrates." That's strong, muscular self-expression that makes you stand out from the crowd! We are also very impressed that you have participated in Harborview's famous residency program.

However, your request for $86K per week is a little bit above the average for the position of Senior Crazy Fuck. To be honest, we don't even pay our Principal Crazy Fucks that much. But keep in mind that there are numerous opportunities for career advancement and personal growth within our organization. We hope we can come to an agreement over this minor point of salary.

We look forward to talking with you in person.

Best regards,

Party Volcano

P.S.: We have heard that you know how to remove livers from humans. Is that true?


No comments: